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第152章

Clemens and Webster were often at the house of General Grant during these early days of 1885, and it must have been Webster who was present with Clemens on the great occasion described in the following telegram.It was on the last day and hour of President Arthur's administration that the bill was passed which placed Ulysses S.Grant as full General with full pay on the retired list, and it is said that the congressional clock was set back in order that this enactment might become a law before the administration changed.General Grant had by this time developed cancer and was already in feeble health.

Telegram to Mrs.Clemens, in Hartford:

NEW YORK, Mar.4, 1885.

To MRS.S.L.CLEMENS, We were at General Grant's at noon and a telegram arrived that the last act of the expiring congress late this morning retired him with full General's rank and accompanying emoluments.The effect upon him was like raising the dead.We were present when the telegram was put in his hand.

S.L.CLEMENS.

Something has been mentioned before of Mark Twain's investments and the generally unprofitable habit of them.He had a trusting nature, and was usually willing to invest money on any plausible recommendation.He was one of thousands such, and being a person of distinction he now and then received letters of inquiry, complaint, or condolence.A minister wrote him that he had bought some stocks recommended by a Hartford banker and advertised in a religious paper.He added, "After I made that purchase they wrote me that you had just bought a hundred shares and that you were a 'shrewd' man."The writer closed by asking for further information.He received it, as follows:

To the Rev.J----, in Baltimore:

WASHINGTON, Mch.2,'85.

MY DEAR SIR,--I take my earliest opportunity to answer your favor of Feb.

B---- was premature in calling me a "shrewd man." I wasn't one at that time, but am one now--that is, I am at least too shrewd to ever again invest in anything put on the market by B----.I know nothing whatever about the Bank Note Co., and never did know anything about it.B----sold me about $4,000 or $5,000 worth of the stock at $110, and I own it yet.He sold me $10,000 worth of another rose-tinted stock about the same time.I have got that yet, also.I judge that a peculiarity of B----'s stocks is that they are of the staying kind.I think you should have asked somebody else whether I was a shrewd man or not for two reasons: the stock was advertised in a religious paper, a circumstance which was very suspicious; and the compliment came to you from a man who was interested to make a purchaser of you.I am afraid you deserve your loss.A financial scheme advertised in any religious paper is a thing which any living person ought to know enough to avoid; and when the factor is added that M.runs that religious paper, a dead person ought to know enough to avoid it.

Very Truly Yours S.L.CLEMENS.

The story of Huck Finn was having a wide success.Webster handled it skillfully, and the sales were large.In almost every quarter its welcome was enthusiastic.Here and there, however, could be found an exception; Huck's morals were not always approved of by library reading-committees.The first instance of this kind was reported from Concord; and would seem not to have depressed the author-publisher.

To Chas.L.Webster, in New York:

Mch 18, '85.

DEAR CHARLEY,--The Committee of the Public Library of Concord, Mass, have given us a rattling tip-top puff which will go into every paper in the country.They have expelled Huck from their library as "trash and suitable only for the slums." That will sell 25,000 copies for us sure.

S.L.C.

Perhaps the Concord Free Trade Club had some idea of ****** amends to Mark Twain for the slight put upon his book by their librarians, for immediately after the Huck Finn incident they notified him of his election to honorary membership.

Those were the days of "authors' readings," and Clemens and Howells not infrequently assisted at these functions, usually given as benefits of one kind or another.From the next letter, written following an entertainment given for the Longfellow memorial, we gather that Mark Twain's opinion of Howells's reading was steadily improving.

To W.D.Howells, in Boston:

HARTFORD, May 5, '85.

MY DEAR HOWELLS,--.....Who taught you to read? Observation and thought, I guess.And practice at the Tavern Club?--yes; and that was the best teaching of all:

Well, you sent even your daintiest and most delicate and fleeting points home to that audience--absolute proof of good reading.But you couldn't read worth a damn a few years ago.I do not say this to flatter.It is true I looked around for you when I was leaving, but you had already gone.

Alas, Osgood has failed at last.It was easy to see that he was on the very verge of it a year ago, and it was also easy to see that he was still on the verge of it a month or two ago; but I continued to hope--but not expect that he would pull through.The Library of Humor is at his dwelling house, and he will hand it to you whenever you want it.

To save it from any possibility of getting mixed up in the failure, perhaps you had better send down and get it.I told him, the other day, that an order of any kind from you would be his sufficient warrant for its delivery to you.

In two days General Grant has dictated 50 pages of foolscap, and thus the Wilderness and Appomattox stand for all time in his own words.This makes the second volume of his book as valuable as the first.

He looks mighty well, these latter days.

Yrs Ever MARK.

"I am exceedingly glad," wrote Howells, "that you approve of my reading, for it gives me some hope that I may do something on the platform next winter.....but I would never read within a hundred miles of you, if I could help it.You simply straddled down to the footlights and took that house up in the hollow of your hand and tickled it."To W.D.Howells, in Boston:

ELMIRA, July 21, 1885.

MY DEAR HOWELLS,--You are really my only author; I am restricted to you, I wouldn't give a damn for the rest.

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