Anonymous
别人只是你的一面镜子
心灵寄语
生活中一切不顺心的事物，都可以将其当做一面镜子，让它给我们一个机会来看清楚自己，认识自己。我们不要一味地想着评判他人、改变他人；而是要好好运用眼前的人和事物作为反观自照的镜子来不断地改变自己、修正自己。
The first time you meet someone，in the first moment you form an impression in your mind of that person。Your reactions
to other people，however，are really just barometers1for how you perceive yourself。Your reactions to others say more about you than they do about others。You cannot really love or hate about yourself。We are usually drawn to those who are most like us and tend to dislike those who display those aspects of ourselves that we dislike。
Therefore，you can allow others to be the mirror to illuminate2more clearly your own feelings of self-worth。Conversely，you can view the people you judge negatively as mirrors to show you what you are not accepting about yourself。
To coexist peacefully with others，you will need to learn tolerance。A big challenge is to shift your perspective radically3from judgment of others to a lifelong exploration of yourself。Your task is to assess all the decisions，judgments you make on to others and to begin to view them as clues to how you can heal yourself and become whole。
I recently have a business lunch with a man who displayed objectionable4table manners。My first reaction was to judge him as offensive and his table manners as disgusting。When I noticed that I was judging him，I stopped and asked myself what I was feeling。I discovered that I was embarrassed to be seen with someone who was chewing with his mouth open and loudly blowing his nose。I was astonished to find how much I cared about how the other people in the restaurant perceived me。
Remember that your judgment of someone will not serve as a protective shield5against you becoming like him。Just because I judge my lunch partner as offensive does not prevent me from ever looking or acting like him。In the same way，extending tolerance to him would not cause me to suddenly begin chewing my food with my mouth open。
When you approach life in this manner，those with whom you have the greatest grievances6as well as those you admire and love can be seen as mirrors，guiding you to discover parts of yourself that you reject and to embrace your greatest quality。
佚名
当你第一次见到某人时，那一瞬间你会对那个人形成第一印象。你对他人的反应像晴雨表一样，恰恰反映出了你是如何看待自己的。你不可能真正地喜欢或讨厌自己。我们通常和那些与自己趣味相投的人结为好友，而往往厌恶那些展示出我们自身某些缺点的人。
因此，以他人为镜，能让你更清楚地了解到你对自我价值的感受。反之，对于不认同的人，你也能以之为镜，了解到你对自身所不满意的方面。
与他人和睦相处，你必须学会宽容。从根本上转变视角，对于每个人来说都是一个巨大的挑战，我们需将对别人的评判转变为对自身的不断反省。你的任务就是评估自己对他人的判断和决定，然后参考这些评判，来不断完善和改进自我。
我最近和一位商业伙伴一起吃午饭，他的吃相实在让我讨厌。我的第一反应就是把他定义为一个粗鲁无礼，吃相令人厌恶的家伙。当我意识到自己正在评判他时，便停下来扪心自问，发现自己觉得跟这么一个张大嘴吃饭，大声擤鼻涕的人在一起吃饭很丢脸。同时也惊奇地发现自己是那么地在乎餐馆里其他人对我的看法。
请记住，你对他人的评判并不排除你像他那样的可能性。如果我认为那位客户粗鲁无礼，并不能意味着我永远都不会有他那样的行为。同样，如果我对他宽容，也不意味着我要立刻像他一样突然张大嘴咀嚼。
当你用这种方式拥抱生活，就能把那些你最不满以及最钦佩和爱戴的人当做一面镜子，指引你去发现自身的缺憾，同时欣赏你自己的优秀品质。
V
词汇空间
ocabulary
1.barometer n。 气压计，晴雨表
2.illuminate v。 阐明，照亮
3.radically adv。 根本的，极端的
4.objectionable adj。 令人不快的，令人反感的
5.shield n。 掩护物，屏障
6.grievance n。 委屈，苦衷
文化链接
Culture Background
餐桌礼仪
现代较为流行的中餐宴饮礼仪是在继续传统与参考国外礼仪的基础上发展而来的。其座次借西方宴会以右为上的法则，第一主宾就坐于主人右侧，第二主宾在主人左侧或第一主宾右侧，变通处理，斟酒上菜由宾客右侧进行，先主宾，后主人，先女宾，后男宾。酒斟八分，不可过满。这些餐桌礼仪不仅可以使整个宴饮过程和谐有序，更使主客身份和情感得以体现和交流。
妙语拾珠
1.Therefore，you can allow others to be the mirror to illuminate more clearly your own feelings of self-worth。
因此，以他人为镜，能让你更清楚地了解到你对自我价值的感受。
2.When you approach life in this manner，those with whom you have the greatest grievances as well as those you admire and love can be seen as mirrors，guiding you to discover parts of yourself that you reject and to embrace your greatest quality。
当你用这种方式拥抱生活，就能把那些你最不满以及最钦佩和爱戴的人当做一面镜子，指引你去发现自身的缺憾，同时欣赏你自己的优秀品质。
